I Resolve to Have a Resolution ....

With a new year bring a new list of goals and hopes. 2012 was a good year for Kam and I. We did a lot of exploring and created quite a few things. I can't wait to see what 2013 brings us.

Well without further adieu, here they are. The resolutions for 2013! 
(I feel that if I document them and post them on here I will hold myself more accountable and stick with them.)

• Maintain the healthy and active lifestyle I started in 2012. I have never been this healthy in my life and have no intention of slowing it down now. I love eating clean and inspiring those around me to do the same. I have changed my lifestyle considerably and do not regret a single change I have made. I am now a non smoker in my file at the doctors office and words cannot express how amazing that feels, I no longer drink either. I still enjoy a glass of wine here and there with dinner, but limit to one glass and can count on one hand how many adult beverages I have had in 4 months. I realized we only get one body to live in for our period of time on Earth, so we should treat it like it is an endangered species.
  
• Read more books. I already read often, but I figured that there is no such thing as too much literature. It is also good me time and it is one of my favorite things to do.
  
• Ride 1,000 miles on my mean machine. My bike is my obsession (other than Kam and coffee) and I cannot wait to see what I can do with myself on that thing this year. I love the snow fall and appreciate the humidity it brings, but I can't lie, spring cannot come soon enough. I am craving a long ride and the sun on my back. April, May, maybe even March please arrive soon!
  
• Exercise 5 times a week vs my usual 3. I am very good about doing 3 a week, but figured why not push it to the next level. If I want to get to my goal weight by the end of March I need to kick it up a notch. It is going well so far and hope to continue as strong as I started.
  
• Be the best mom I can be. Kam loves me so much and in his eyes I can do no wrong. Sometimes I feel as if he gives me too much credit. I try to do the little things, take him to the park, read stories every night, watch TV in moderation and tell him I love him every chance I get. I wonder though if I could do more. Or should I say less. I should put down the phone more often, set aside the magazine and not worry so much about my hair. It is my goal to be just a bit more involved and hands on.
  
• Do what makes me happy. Simple as that. And do it well. 

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

I know this post is coming just a bit late, but staying true to my motto "always late but worth the wait" I felt it only necessary to post in January. Quite frankly it has taken me this long to recover from the holiday hangover that follows.

Christmas was good to us this year. Due to a hiccup in my work situation (I will get to that later) I was able to spend the holiday uninterrupted with Kam and my family came up the morning of and spent it with us. Santa spoiled Kam and he got almost everything on his list. Everything except for a pretend glass of milk, which Santa had a had time getting due to such limited quantities. The leaf blower he has been eyeing for quite sometime appeared under the tree with a tool box and a hard hat with a light to go with it. We are still working on playing with everything! His most prized possession is a giant stuffed puppy, which he named Puppy the Puppy. I call him Puppy for short. Puppy has a spot on our board games and has even sat in on dinner with us. Kam claims to like him more than a real dog because he doesn't poop in the house or stink.

I received an amazing gift from my friend. It was a donation made in my name to the Christmas Box International. She enclosed a story with it and oh man did that get me. I was a blubbering mess by the end of it. I also received a pretty awesome new coffee pot to help support me in my addictive habit. Kam gave me a drill. Now this may sound funny to some of you, not to this girl! I have been wanting a drill for years now! I am so excited! I cannot wait to get the pinterest projects going!

Needless to say after all the hustle and bustle I am sad to see it go, but in a small way relieved to have it over with. It is so magical with a little one in the home. Sometimes all that magic causes a whole lot of exhaustion, so until next year Saint Nick!

Kam's elf Vixen left a special letter and this snow globe before heading back to the north pole. 

All boy! 

"well you can still hold me tomorrow"

5 years. It has been 5 years since Kam came into this world and blessed us with his grace and happy personality. I will never forget the day he was born. He was just as stubborn then as he is now. It was one of the worst snow storms of the year. Family and friends that were traveling to the hospital to greet him drove through a blizzard that covered all of east Idaho. I was induced on the 20th of December at 7:00 in the morning. 20 hours later at 2:52 AM he finally decided to give in and join the party. The first cry was a sound that I will never forget. To say he was perfect is an understatement. He had all 10 fingers and toes, and was beautiful. His lips were a beautiful shade of red and he had the fairest skin. Round eyes and the softest cheeks. I was then, and still am, so smitten with this little boy. They say that when the child is born, so is the mother. That couldn't be more true.

When children grow up it is the most bittersweet process to be a part of. Each age and stage has so many great qualities as well as struggles. In the years that Kam has been around I have been blessed with a little boy who is wise beyond his years, defines the term 'unconditional love' and graces everyone in his presence with his sweet charm.

I remember the first night home with him. I was 19 years old and scared out of my mind. My mom stayed with us that night and what a help it was. If it wasn't for her I wouldn't have eaten that night because I couldn't set him down to get anything done. I put him in the bassinet next to my bed and called it a night pretty early. At some point in the night he woke up with a hungry belly and I did what I think most new moms do, pulled him into my bed and nursed him to sleep. He never made another peep until morning. I remember waking up extremely stiff knowing that I didn't move an inch in the night as not to squish my baby. He was lying on his back swaddled up in a blanket and I was wrapped around him. The sun was coming in the window and his little tiny profile, I will never forget, was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. His tiny button nose was so adorable. That little nose was then, and still is, my favorite feature.

Tonight when we were talking about his birthday I mentioned to him that I didn't want him to grow up. "Why not mommy?" he said. "I just don't want you to get big." I replied staring off into the distance remembering that first morning and his tiny nose. "Well Mommy. You can still hold me tomorrow. I will only be 5." It was then, at that moment, I looked down and caught a glimpse of his profile and saw that cute little button nose. He couldn't be more correct. I can, and most certainly will, still hold him tomorrow. I mean after all, he will only be 5.

I love you Kameron Christopher John.

A year in photos...

It has been a year since I have done this. (I used to be so on top of this blog!) For the record this past year has been a busy year so at least I have a reason as to why I fell behind, or at least an excuse. To make it easier I decided to just do a picture for each month. So here you have it, a year in photos.....

January, date night. This month was so cold we stayed inside for most of it. We developed a date night tradition this month also. I want Kam to look back and remember doing those one on one things with me that so many kids don't get. One of the advantages to being a single momma, he is my one and only!

 



February! I made a fun little weekend trip to Vegas with my great friends Jackie and Jenn. It all spurred on the idea of going for Valentines Day since we (well Jackie and I) were single. I ate way too much food and spent 3 nights walking the strip with some great people!

March...I turned 24. One more year to lower insurance rates! I celebrated with a Jazz vs Heat basketball game, sushi at my favorite sushi joint in Salt Lake, and a glass of wine. All of course all happened with the best girlfriends a girl could ask for!

April- Kam learned about cooties. Kam also learned that Moms are cootie free and are always allowed in his bedroom. Especially to help clean it up. :)

May, AKA national ride your bike month. Seeing as how it is a whole month dedicated to pedaling, I went out and bought myself some new wheels. This was by far one of the best investments a person can make. I dropped 2 pant sizes, and started onto a much healthier lifestyle. Not to mention it is an activity that Kam enjoys doing with me.

June, the beginning of summer! Kam and I were lucky enough to get invited to go boating at Palisades with my friend Andrea. It was a BLAST!! Kam loved every minute of it and it was worth the blistering sunburn. For the record, Neutrogena waterproof SPF 50 spray can does in fact NOT work.

July- UPGRADED! Kam and I got a shiny new whip! It is a Ford Fusion. I took it upon myself to name her "The Fuss". That way when people say "What is all the fuss about?!" I can just point to my girl.

August, summertime was slowly coming to an end. This is Kam and I enjoying ourselves at a baseball game. This was one of our fun little date nights that I mentioned in January. Please refer to the first picture for further information.

September, one of my favorite months because of the annual Colton family reunion. This year it was just Clint, Kam, and myself that went to represent my family, but it was so much fun! We did a photo booth for an activity and it was a hit!

October... BOO! Kam was a cute little spiderman for Halloween. Ok ok, he was the custest spiderman there ever was! He was so sweet and cute at each house. We wrapped up our night of spooks and scares with some carmel apple cider at Starbucks.

November, a month of thanks. I was lucky enough to host the big dinner this year for my family. My first time cooking a bird and it was a SUCCESS! I am so thankful for this wonderful life I have been blessed with and all those whom I get to share it with!

23 years young and 4 years old

Kam will be turning 4 on Wednesday. 4. I can't believe that it has already been 4 years. I mean really. Really? Yes, really. I had no idea when I was 19 that my life was just beginning. To be more precise a life with purpose. The past 4 years has been an adventure of sorts. With any adventure there has been surprises, challenges, trials and excitement. This adventure in particular has had a whole lot of love. . .

I know my post about Kam's birthday is coming a few days early, but to be completely honest I don't think my hands will be empty that day so I won't be able to type this on his birthday . Why you ask? Well the answer is because I will be too busy holding him. Too busy enjoying every minute that I am able to wrap my arms around him and take in his young innocence. If the first few years have went by this fast I can't imagine the next few. The thought of him getting taller and bigger than me causes that lump to form in my throat. We all know that lump I am talking about. Its a terrible one. I may or may not have it right now just thinking about him growing up. I just want to take the next few days of him being 3 and hold onto it forever.

I have learned so much over the past few years. Some examples of those lessons are to never cry over spilt milk (literally. Even if it is on your brand new furniture. You cry they cry. Not good.), no day is so bad it  cannot be fixed with a nap, be curious, and read every day. I feel like I am getting younger every year thanks to Kam. I giggle like a school girl and run around through the sprinklers every summer. If you ever need to feel young again throw on a suit and skip through the sprinklers. Guaranteed elixir for aging.

As much as I don't want my baby to become a man I unfortunately know it is inevitable. As it pains me to say it I am looking forward to the next year however. Now if you would excuse me I have a 3 year old that will only want to sleep in my bed for so much longer to go cuddle with. :)

Oh hello December...

Ok this blog is collecting dust. To my friends that enjoy reading it my apologies for the lack of posts. I need a personal assistant to keep up on it for me. For my life just being Kam and I, it sure is busy. It's probably a good thing I am not octomom or I wouldn't have time for anything, especially not my lil ol' blog. Enough of the chatter about how little time I have. Let's get on with it!

With so much going on since we have moved back to Rigby I will just start with the big important stuff...with that being said I am happy to say I got a new job. Say hello to the store manager at Gymboree in Idaho Falls! It was a very sudden change to take on. They contacted me on a Tuesday and offered me the job on Friday. I have no regrets taking it on and love it so far. My district manager is great, My team is amazing and Kam's wardrobe is growing substantially. All in all life is good. Kam's growing so fast and has more personality than I can handle. (I can't imagine where he gets that from....)

My sister is set to close on her house and be moved out by the 30th of December. I am really going to miss having them just down the road from me and I am sure Kam will miss going over there everyday. He did tell me that he is excited to go visit them when they leave though. Looks like we will be vacationing in Boise this next year. I am hoping to find him a daycare that combines preschool into it so he can have a jump start on reading and all that good stuff. He told me the other day that he really wants to be a doctor. When I asked him what kind he replied "The kind that gives shots to kids when they are sick." I fully intend on doing everything I can to promote this kind of thinking and so preschool here we come!

Halloween was so much fun this year. Kam was a chicken. If you ask me I think he was the cutest chicken on this side of the Mississippi. We went trick or treating with my sister and her family. The kids were so cute and managed to stay warm because they were running marathons through the neighborhood we went to. Apparently they were worried there would be a candy shortage and they had to sprint from house to house. I once again found myself evaluating my lifestyle and wondered how I got so out of shape. I pondered this while eating a handful of Kameron's candy after he was asleep. :)

Pump the Brakes

Life is hectic. I need to remind myself to take time to smell the flowers more often. (Even though it is fall now and the flowers are longggg gone...) Kam and I have been keeping busy with the hustle and bustle that is our life. Between trips to Daddy's house, work, my gazillion hobbies, and spending time with the special people in my circle, I rarely find time to do this. To write. I need to find time once a week, at minimum, to just sit and type away. The sound of the keyboard is almost therapeutic...almost as therapeutic as making lists. SO...here I go! Consider yourself warned it may be long. :)

What in the heck Kam and I have been doing lately....errr...since JULY!

• Decorating the new house. (yes still.) 
• Taking walks.
• Baking. Awhile ago I made a list (go freaking figure) of some things I wanted to accomplish. One of which was baking bread. Not just any bread. Good bread. Well cross that off the bucket list. Thanks Kels. 
• Drinking pinot grigio. This one doesn't so much apply to Kam. No worries, he is still holding strongly to his chocolate milk addiction. 
• Chasing butterflies. 
• Shopping. Retail therapy. 
• Christmas shopping. Boo yeah. No last minute anxiety for me. 
• Dying my hair brown. Yes, I love it. I find myself looking in the mirror and asking "Mattie, why the hell didn't you do this sooner?"
• Smiling. 
• Crocheting. I recently got the ingenious idea from a friend to make an iPad cover. Thank you for that one Jackie. 
• Taking bubble baths. 
• Reading books. The one I am reading now is one of those life changing ones that will get its own post when I finish it. 
• Coping with the idea that my sister is moving to Boise. Everyone copes in their own way, for me it is crying on my way to work and sometimes home and NOT talking too much about it. I secretly keep hoping they will change their mind. 
• Praying. 
• Eating more than our share of corn dogs. Kam and I need to be submitted to a corn dog rehabilitation center. 
• Getting new boots. Kam is still unsure that he likes them. I needed a change. I am sure he will come around. 
• One word: Pinterest. 
• Coloring pictures. 
• Eating mint chocolate chip ice cream. I am still unsure as to how in the world I lost 10 pounds recently. I am just going to go with the whole concept of leave well enough alone. 
• Giggling with my ladies. Ahhhh without them I would be so lost. I love all of you. 
• Planning the Christmas decorations. I am so excited. 
• Getting behind on the laundry. So behind that in one day I did 6 loads. 6. For two people!
• Lighting the fall scented candles. 
• Learning about return on investment. Cars backpack is proving to have a pretty good one. 
• Reminding myself to breathe. Enjoy life. And blog more often. I feel better already. 

Jean Pants

Kam is currently in a cowboy phase. He truly believes that he is a cowboy and in case you were wondering, it IS the cutest thing ever. He wakes up bright and early and picks out his own outfit which consists of "jean pants", a tee shirt, cowboy boots, and his cowboy hat. I have been learning a lot since we started this journey.  I have learned more than I ever thought possible. One area that has really been capitalized on is how to be a cowboy. If you were wondering what it takes to roam the wild west on a horse let me tell you.

• No bubble baths. Cowboys in this day and age ONLY shower. They have apparently came a long way. All this time I thought they didn't shower at all. 
• Cowboys wake up with the sun. They have a lot to do. 
• When cowboys go to bed they must sleep with tractor blankets. 
• Indoors is no place for a cowboy. They like to be outside chewing on a piece of grass looking off into the distance. 
• "Jean pants" aren't a question. They are the answer. 

I hope that I have enlightened you with this information. I know I have been enlightened.

"I love you from your toes to your face."

Today is the first day in over a week that I have been alone without Kam. He is with his dad having a ball and I am wandering around like a lost puppy dog. I had big plans for my mommy time, so far I have worked and thought about all my mommy time plans. I was going to spend some quality time with a book and in the hot tub, take extra long showers and listen to anything but Jason Aldean 'Big Green Tractor'. Needless to say I haven't done much but think about how quiet it is without him and count down the minutes until he comes back. Goodness I sound selfish. I am not. His daddy and him are probably loving every minute of it, which makes me feel good, however, I am still feeling like a lost puppy. 

When I was driving to work today I thought a lot about Kam. Nothing new there, but today I thought more about how amazing someone who is 3 feet tall can be. He has done so much for me and he has no idea. Kam has always been there for me and I know that our bond is strong enough that he will always be there for me and I will always be there for him. No matter what. He is the definition of love. My definition of love. That is what matters most. Everyday he reminds me to get up and be somebody. I am a lot of people. I am a daughter, sister, friend, aunt, boss, but the best someone I can be is his mommy. 

Kam sets such a strong example for me in so many ways. He reminds me to show emotion and let people know how I feel. I may not do this in the same way he sometimes does. (Screaming in Wal-Mart isn't really my cup of tea and hopefully it won't be his for much longer.) 

He teaches me that if I am happy say I am happy. If I am sad, exhausted or just upset, it is OK to cry. 

Saying I love you to someone is one of the most important things he reminds me to do. The way I feel when he tells me he loves me, makes me want to tell everyone close to me I love them, just so they can feel the warm feeling it offers. 

He teaches me to be artistic. Every color is a good one and everything should have lots of color. 

He shows me how to take responsibility for my actions. If I made the mess, clean it up. He cleans up his messes, so should I. 

Wake up in the morning and eat a giant bowl of sunshine for breakfast. I have never in my life known anyone to be as happy to be awake before dawn as he is. 

Be a friend. Be nice. Give big squeezes and wet kisses. 

Be a kid. 

I love you Kameron Christopher John. 

Don't change a thing about you. You are perfect the way you are. I grew you that way. 

Christmas In July

OK so I am fully aware that it is July, but I would just like to let my family and friends know some things that I would like for Christmas. So here is some of my list. Keep in mind that what goes around comes around and I have already been conjuring up ideas for the people in my life. This list includes, but is not limited to,

• A treadmill
• Spa package
• An Audi. With a warranty.
• Red bottom heels.
• Jessica Simpson luggage. The zebra print ones. 
• Unlimited spray tans for a year, most spas have this option in their packages, refer to number 2 on the list. 
• Nordstroms gift card. 
• Fridge for my wine. 
• Last but not least, a winning lottery ticket.

I would like to say thank you in advance. I cannot wait to feel the joy this Christmas season pour over me when I see these gifts under my tree. I would also like to let you know that I am open to ideas and suggestions as to what you would like to receive this year. Like I said what goes around comes around. :)

Turning the Page...finally...

I must be doing something right. For those of you who don't know, I finally got a job in Idaho Falls. I am so ready. I have never been so excited to move over 100 miles in my life. I have never been so excited to MOVE in my entire life. OK on to the good stuff. The details. (I am sick of repeating myself on what is going on so if you would like to know...please continue reading.)

I got a job working for American Eagle as an assistant manager in the Idaho Falls mall. I am hoping to only be an assistant for a year and work my way up to being the store manager. Kam and I will be staying in Rigby for 2 weeks with only our necessities, until I can find a place to live. We will be living in Rigby so my amazing sister can babysit Kam. My sister is so amazing, (I am sure hearing that never gets old to her.) she was able to pull some strings and get Kam into a preschool class that starts in September. Her kids go to it and they absolutely love it.

Kam is handling everything very well. I thought I was excited, but he has me beat by far. He continually asks if we can live on Aunt Carrie's road so he can ride his bike. I asked if he could finance the home loan for me and he said yes. I told him we would further the discussion in 2 years. :)

Everything is moving along great. I am hoping it continues this way. I couldn't be happier right now. Wish us luck in our new journey!

Until Further Notice

I believe in perfect timing. I always have and I always will.

I also believe that good things fall apart and better things fall together.

Life is funny sometimes. Just when you think you have everything figured out something happens and you look at things very differently.

I have been reminding myself a lot lately that everything happens for a reason. One day it will all work out.

So until further notice,

CELEBRATE EVERYTHING.

I Had The Best Day With You Today...

Some days are extra special with Kam. Today was one of them. I don't know exactly what it is that makes some of our days more special than others, but it happens, and when it does I love it.

Today started like any other Monday. Hectic. I was only 5 minutes late to work though. It could have been worse and it has been worse trust me. Kam went off to daycare and I went to work. After daycare I took Kam to get a slurpee from 7-11. They were giving out free ones so we decided we should go get one. By 5:00 the free ones were all gone, we of course got there at 5:15. There was no way I could tell Kam no after I had him all hyped up for it the whole way there so we got some anyway. He was so happy! An 8oz slurpee made him feel like the luckiest little boy ever, and I felt like the best mommy ever.

When we got home Kam went to his friends houses to see if any of them were home. A sad and bored little Kam quickly discovered that not a single one of his friends were home. This actually excited me a little bit. This meant I got to spend some one on one time with him. (Something we both needed after a long weekend in Rigby.) We made an awesome dinner of crabby patties, salad and fresh fruit.

When we were getting dinner ready Kam and I were practicing counting with baby carrots and hamburger buns when he asked why there was only 2 of us. I said "1, 2, me and you! That's just how it is there is 2 of us here!" Kam looked up at me and said "I wish I had a daddy at this house." I of course started to tear up, leaned down gave him a squeeze and said "Well with a mommy like me you don't need a daddy at 2 houses. We manage to do alright. One day you will have a daddy at both of your houses, but we have to wait until everything is just right." This little comment, or wish if you may, made me think. I told myself that I had to find the silver lining and couldn't let it get me down.

After dinner Kam and I went outside and played soccvolleybasketfootball. It was so much fun. We got to see two dragonflies and had a tickle fight. After we were all wore out we laid out on the grass and looked at the sky. It started to rain about three minutes after we were lying there. Instead of freaking out and running inside I let Kam lay there and LAUGH at the raindrops. Within no time at all we were both laying in the rain laughing our butts off. I am sure the neighbors think I am crazy, and that my son is taking after me, but it doesn't matter. We enjoyed every minute of it.

Tonight when Kam said his bedtime prayer, almost all by himself, he once more thanked God for his mommy. When I tucked him in he proceeded to tell me that he loves everything about me. After shutting his door I sat there and smiled. The silver lining to him not having a two parents at each house is that I have him all to myself on nights like tonight. I know that it might not always be easy, but it has always been worth it. Always. I can only hope that one day when he is older he can look back and know that his mommy loves him and would do anything for him. That is why there is only me at this house. I don't want to share him and his sweet self...yet. :)

Thanks for today Kam. I had the best day with you today.

Not a care in the world. . .

What Have We Been Up To

Kam and I have been extremely busy the past week or so. Jess and I did our first craft booth. We learned the hard way that procrastination is NOT key. We drank lots of coffee and had 1 too many late nights. By late I mean sewing blankets until 3:00 AM. Not the best idea. That took up a lot of my time. A lot.

We spent the 4th in Malad with my family. It was supposed to be a 2 night stay, which turned into a 5 night stay. The tags on my car expired on Friday the 1st. I went to the courthouse (In Malad) Friday at 4:47. They close at 4:45. Is this some sort of sick joke?! Nope. The woman was very rude and was more interested in calling in her fried chicken order to Thomas Market than even acknowledging my presence. Since it was a holiday weekend I decided to just stay in Malad rather than drive through Utah with expired tags. This meant that I would have to stay until Tuesday morning to get them taken care of. I hope her fried chicken was worth it. I am still frustrated.

My sister, Carrie, and her family came to Malad which was fun because the cousins got to play together. Kam cannot get enough of his cousins. Jason loves him so much. It is adorable to watch Jason follow "Mameron" around. That was one plus to staying an extra 3 nights. Too bad they left for Rigby on Sunday which left me for 2 more nights and nobody to keep me entertained.

The parade was on Monday and Kam loved every minute of that. He made out pretty darn good as far as the amount of candy he got. His little Elmo bucket was full. He even got an otter pop and a bottle of water. The throwing of the water bottles was a bit concerning to me. They were throwing them pretty hard and the audience consisted mostly of small children. Big red flag? Yeah I thought so. Later that day I found Kam in a candy coma passed out on the living room floor. In his boxers. Surrounded by candy wrappers. He had a high fructose corn syrup crash apparently.

By the time Tuesday rolled around I was ready to get the hell out of dodge. I got my car registered by the woman who loves fried chicken and jetted for Logan. **I left out the small part that while in Malad my eyes were extremely itchy and red. What I thought was allergies.** I met Kam's dad at my work and they took him for his days with daddy. I sat in the parking lot for a few minutes thinking about my extreme eye conditions. It was bad. I thought I better go to the doctor since pink eye has been going around Malad and I am extremely paranoid. $150 later the doctor has a prescription for some antibiotics and told me to "treat it like pink eye since I was exposed." There was however, a small chance that it could be an infection from wearing my contacts too much with all the allergies. So here I am sitting at the urgent care thinking "of all the weekends to contract some highly contagious infection, it had to be the one that I was around a gazillion people. Awesome." My work told me that I couldn't work until it was taken care of, which is 5 days, which means a week off work. So here I am, no work, no Kam, and noooo desire to pick up a craft project after that booth. So I napped. A lot. It was amazing.

That is the past 2 weeks in a giant nutshell. Now here are some pictures for your viewing pleasure.

Remember that Mother's Day flower Kam gave me? The flower that had 1 tiny little flower blooming on it? Well this is it now. I am so proud I can not only keep Kam alive for as long as I have, but I can also turn that tiny little flower into this masterpiece!!!

My mohawked little guy chowing down on 1 of the 5 dozen cookies we baked. I love him so much.

Happy Birthday America!!!

So You Say What You Are Happy To Have

A few weeks ago Kam and I attended church. First time in (I hate to say this) almost 3 years. Kam is still getting the hang of the whole prayer thing. He hates folding his arms and refuses to close his eyes. Shouting "AMEN!" at the top of his lungs after the prayer oh he is all over it. I decided that since I pray every night before bed, I should introduce him to bedtime prayer also. Tonight was the first night. This is how it went.

"Ok Kam we are going to say bedtime prayers tonight" "Why?" "So you can tell God what you are thankful for and ask him for help if you need any." Kam is climbing into his recliner in his room at this point and I am kneeling at his bed. "Kam come over here and kneel down with me." "Why?" "That is just how you say a prayer." Reluctantly climbing out of his recliner "Why?" By now I am beginning to wonder if we are playing 20 questions. "It is just how you do it Kam. Now put your hands like this and I want you to think of anything that you are happy to have." "Why?" "So think about anything that you are happy to have and we will tell God thank you for giving it to us." "I donno mommy" "OK I will start the prayer...You say what I say. Dear Heavenly Father..." "Dear Heabenewy Faduu" "I am thankful for..." I am getting a blank stare at this point. "So say what you are happy to have Kam" Blank stare. "So say what you are happy to have." "You. I'm happy about you." Tears are welling up in my eyes. "I am thankful for my mommy..." "I am tankfoool fo my mommy." "OK what else..." "Ummmm my bed." "I am thankful to have a warm bed to sleep in..." "I am tankfool to hab a warm bed to sweep in." "Is there anything else Kam?" "Ummm no." "I say these things...." Getting cut off by a very eager Kam at this point, "IN HEABENEWY FADDER AMEN!!!"

Overall I think it was a pretty good first bedtime prayer with mommy. He never ceases to amaze me with his gratitude. When he told me he was happy about me I almost lost it. (OK I did lose it. Just a little.) It made me feel so warm and fuzzy to know that someone is thankful enough about me in their life they told God.

"It is not a slight thing when those that are so fresh from God, love us in return." -Charles Dickens

It Is About That Time Again....

The time that I have a few glasses of wine and let loose. Talk talk talk. This is actually the 2nd time this week I have found myself indulging and enjoying a glass, or 3, of wine. Thank you Jess. Usually my bullet pointed lists are compilations of totally amazing, happy, tear jerking things that I think of. Not tonight. I don't know if it is the zinfandel or the fact that I have had a lot of stress lately (those of you in my closest circle understand), but tonight I am feeling a bit sassy so I have decided to make a list of...

Things that make me go ughhhh.

• Total lack of originality. Really just be yourself.
• Bills. Go away. Is there a bill hell that mine can go to?
• People dressing completely inappropriately for their age and/or weight.
• Idiotic drivers. Especially ones that have kids in the car.
• When I make a delicious pot of coffee and realize that I am completely out of creamer.
• Facebook. I am so glad that is out of my life.
• Dirty people. Not so much the germ people that are unaware of how to use hand sanitizer (although that is disgusting) but people that live in their own filth. Do your damn dishes.
• Dishonesty. Just be real.
• People that complain all the time about something, but yet do nothing to change it. If you think you are fat STOP eating at McDonalds.
• Fake people. If you don't like me, don't kiss my butt. Tell me the truth. Chances are I don't care for you either.
• Mustard. I have tried it once. This year. It was OK. Watching Kam spoon it off his plate makes me gag though. Same goes for pickles. Sorry Shay I know that those 2 things make up your food pyramid.
• Paying to do my laundry. For a person that has OCD that shit adds up.
• The person that pretends to have a perfect life. We all know you fight with your spouse and cry sometimes too. It's normal human behavior.
• Flakey people. Holy crap. Biggest pet peeve EVER. Follow up and follow through.
• Wearing way too much bronzer. You look orange. Stop that.
• The annoying teenagers that fly through neighborhoods going ridiculous speeds. Hello it is a neighborhood not the drag strip. There are children around. Not to mention sleeping children. That is a sacred thing. So turn the damn gangster rap down too. Your system isn't that cool .
• Clerks at stores that do not talk to you. I am here to give you my business aka my money. Acknowledge me.
• Mud. Need I say more.
• That person that complains about money, yet has new stuff all the freaking time.
• People that stare at my tattoos. I know they are there. I also know they are beautiful and a part of me. No need to gawk at them.
• Wood pencils. The number 2 pencil. The sound they make gives me the chills.
• Gossip. Not to mention the people that start and stir the pot. Get a life. Talk about wasted energy.
• Women that touch a pregnant woman's belly. I was once pregnant and did not want to be touched. This drove me nuts.
• The conversation that goes like this ..... "so when did you and Kam's dad get a divorce?" "Oh we were never married." "You were never married?" Hello I just said that do I need to repeat myself. Really? Or this one ...... "So what does your husband do?" "I'm not married." "So you aren't married?" Good grief. For the record I am a single mom. I have been the whole time. I like it this way and think it is God's plan for me. Don't be so surprised to find out that I am not, nor have I ever been married. And don't look at me like a deer in head lights when you find out that I haven't been. Or ask a rhetorical question about it.
• Snookie. That girl drives me nuts. I don't know if it is her pickle fetish, the fact that she had a terrible book that I would never ever pay for published, the oompa loompa spray tan, or the hair that bugs me. Could be a combo of all of it. Either way I can't stand her.
• Smart phones. I know I have one, and that thing is taking over my life.

That is all the complaining I have for now. Hopefully I got it all out of my system so I don't feel the need to rant like that for awhile. I feel better now though. Time for happy thoughts.

Remember that time we went to the zoo?

Well here are the pictures. :)

The boys when we first got there.

The STRANGEST bird I have ever seen. Ever.



An excited Kam. (despite the rain)



Venturing over to see the peacock. LaChelle was so afraid she wouldn't even come close to get a picture. :)

Feeding the ducks.

Thank You For That

I feel like with all the hustling I do on a daily basis I sometimes forget to say a simple thank you to those who mean the most and do the most for me. So here is a thank you to all those that help me, inspire me, coach me, guide me, and listen to me.

Kam,
Thank you for giving my life purpose. You are such a tiny little person and yet you do such big things for me. You remind me to look at the little things life has to offer and always to keep a smile on. You are the reason I get out of bed every day, and get through the day. You give me drive. I love you more than I ever thought possible and I am so lucky that you are you, because you make me, me!
Thank you for that.

Mom and Dad,
Thank you for always, no matter what, putting up with me. You guys know the real meaning of unconditional love and show it to me everyday. I know that I haven't been the easiest one to raise, but it has been fun. Thank you for being there for me when I need it most. I couldn't have done what I have done as a single mother if it weren't for you.
Thank you for that.

Carrie,
You have been the best sister anyone could ever ask for. Thank you for always offering your advice, even though it sometimes takes me years to listen to it. You are patient with me, as well as everyone else and that sets such a great example for me. Thank you for always being honest with me and telling me not what I want to hear, but what I need to hear. I know I am always welcome at your home and that there will always be great food to enjoy.
Thank you for that.


Trevor and Kylie,
Thank you for allowing us to establish such a great relationship with one another for Kam. Thank you for being such a huge part of Kam's life. I am so fortunate to have the situation I do as a single mother and because of you guys it is possible. I love when people ask about the situation and all I can do is smile and genuinely say "It is the best thing. Kam has a lot of people who love him."
Thank you for that.

All my friends,
Thank you for no matter what being there for me. I have been blessed with the best. Shaylise, Jessica, Lachelle, Jackie, and sooo many more I hope that I can be there for you just like you have been for me. Thank you for always being true. Through thick and thin. No matter what I know that you are a phone call away.
Thank you for that.

God,
Thank you for trusting me so much. No matter how hard things get I know that with you anything is possible. Thank you for guiding me and helping me get through so much. You have blessed me with the greatest people to share my life with.
Thank you for that.

And he thinks we are just fishing. . .





Now that the weather is nice (some of the time) Kam and I have been fishing twice. He loves it. I love it. OK let me clarify. I love getting out of the house, it is something different than we are used to doing, and if we catch something and my dad or brother are around to take care of the river monster once it is out of the water and my mom is able to prepare it, we have dinner! It makes me feel primitive. In a way. Talk about being the bread winner in the household.

The first time we went was last weekend and we went with my family. Thank heaven for my brother and dad. I would have had no clue what to do with the fish once they hit land. Don't even get me started on getting those hooks out of their mouths, or in some cases their stomachs. My dad caught 6 fish! This is something that happens once every ten years I think. This is just a judgement based on how excited he was, not to mention cocky.  

 This last weekend we went to Rigby with my sister and her family to a free fishing day just for kids. We did not catch anything. Wait, I take that back. Jason caught a sucker fish. That was all though. Kids had fun. It was good for them to all get together and play. 4 kids means 4 fishing poles. Which means a very high probability of lines getting tangles, hooks getting stuck in shirts, and lost bait. It was a very stressful trip. Kam and his cousins had a blast though and that is all that matters.

Kam and I putting a smile on for the camera. Moments after this was taken my stress levels were so high I was asking myself why I didn't bring my vodka.



All the kids at the free fishing day.




I saved the best one for last! This is my proud dad with one of his fish. I thought I better take one so that there is some proof that he actually caught some. Not to mention a quick reference for him to rub it in my little brothers face that he totally kicked his butt that day.

 

Happy Fathers Day Dad!!!



Lock Up Your Daughters!

The other day Kam and I were outside when one of the neighbor girls who is older (like 6) told me that Kam is "sooo cute". She said this with a giggle. I was concerned. He is only 3 and the older women already totally dig him. Lord have mercy.

Nuff said....