Monday, December 19, 2011

23 years young and 4 years old

Kam will be turning 4 on Wednesday. 4. I can't believe that it has already been 4 years. I mean really. Really? Yes, really. I had no idea when I was 19 that my life was just beginning. To be more precise a life with purpose. The past 4 years has been an adventure of sorts. With any adventure there has been surprises, challenges, trials and excitement. This adventure in particular has had a whole lot of love. . .

I know my post about Kam's birthday is coming a few days early, but to be completely honest I don't think my hands will be empty that day so I won't be able to type this on his birthday . Why you ask? Well the answer is because I will be too busy holding him. Too busy enjoying every minute that I am able to wrap my arms around him and take in his young innocence. If the first few years have went by this fast I can't imagine the next few. The thought of him getting taller and bigger than me causes that lump to form in my throat. We all know that lump I am talking about. Its a terrible one. I may or may not have it right now just thinking about him growing up. I just want to take the next few days of him being 3 and hold onto it forever.

I have learned so much over the past few years. Some examples of those lessons are to never cry over spilt milk (literally. Even if it is on your brand new furniture. You cry they cry. Not good.), no day is so bad it  cannot be fixed with a nap, be curious, and read every day. I feel like I am getting younger every year thanks to Kam. I giggle like a school girl and run around through the sprinklers every summer. If you ever need to feel young again throw on a suit and skip through the sprinklers. Guaranteed elixir for aging.

As much as I don't want my baby to become a man I unfortunately know it is inevitable. As it pains me to say it I am looking forward to the next year however. Now if you would excuse me I have a 3 year old that will only want to sleep in my bed for so much longer to go cuddle with. :)


Sunday, December 4, 2011

Oh hello December...

Ok this blog is collecting dust. To my friends that enjoy reading it my apologies for the lack of posts. I need a personal assistant to keep up on it for me. For my life just being Kam and I, it sure is busy. It's probably a good thing I am not octomom or I wouldn't have time for anything, especially not my lil ol' blog. Enough of the chatter about how little time I have. Let's get on with it!

With so much going on since we have moved back to Rigby I will just start with the big important stuff...with that being said I am happy to say I got a new job. Say hello to the store manager at Gymboree in Idaho Falls! It was a very sudden change to take on. They contacted me on a Tuesday and offered me the job on Friday. I have no regrets taking it on and love it so far. My district manager is great, My team is amazing and Kam's wardrobe is growing substantially. All in all life is good. Kam's growing so fast and has more personality than I can handle. (I can't imagine where he gets that from....)

My sister is set to close on her house and be moved out by the 30th of December. I am really going to miss having them just down the road from me and I am sure Kam will miss going over there everyday. He did tell me that he is excited to go visit them when they leave though. Looks like we will be vacationing in Boise this next year. I am hoping to find him a daycare that combines preschool into it so he can have a jump start on reading and all that good stuff. He told me the other day that he really wants to be a doctor. When I asked him what kind he replied "The kind that gives shots to kids when they are sick." I fully intend on doing everything I can to promote this kind of thinking and so preschool here we come!

Halloween was so much fun this year. Kam was a chicken. If you ask me I think he was the cutest chicken on this side of the Mississippi. We went trick or treating with my sister and her family. The kids were so cute and managed to stay warm because they were running marathons through the neighborhood we went to. Apparently they were worried there would be a candy shortage and they had to sprint from house to house. I once again found myself evaluating my lifestyle and wondered how I got so out of shape. I pondered this while eating a handful of Kameron's candy after he was asleep. :)


Monday, October 3, 2011

Pump the Brakes

Life is hectic. I need to remind myself to take time to smell the flowers more often. (Even though it is fall now and the flowers are longggg gone...) Kam and I have been keeping busy with the hustle and bustle that is our life. Between trips to Daddy's house, work, my gazillion hobbies, and spending time with the special people in my circle, I rarely find time to do this. To write. I need to find time once a week, at minimum, to just sit and type away. The sound of the keyboard is almost therapeutic...almost as therapeutic as making lists. SO...here I go! Consider yourself warned it may be long. :)

What in the heck Kam and I have been doing lately....errr...since JULY!

  • Decorating the new house. (yes still.) 
  • Taking walks.
  • Baking. Awhile ago I made a list (go freaking figure) of some things I wanted to accomplish. One of which was baking bread. Not just any bread. Good bread. Well cross that off the bucket list. Thanks Kels. 
  • Drinking pinot grigio. This one doesn't so much apply to Kam. No worries, he is still holding strongly to his chocolate milk addiction. 
  • Chasing butterflies. 
  • Shopping. Retail therapy. 
  • Christmas shopping. Boo yeah. No last minute anxiety for me. 
  • Dying my hair brown. Yes, I love it. I find myself looking in the mirror and asking "Mattie, why the hell didn't you do this sooner?"
  • Smiling. 
  • Crocheting. I recently got the ingenious idea from a friend to make an iPad cover. Thank you for that one Jackie. 
  • Taking bubble baths. 
  • Reading books. The one I am reading now is one of those life changing ones that will get its own post when I finish it. 
  • Coping with the idea that my sister is moving to Boise. Everyone copes in their own way, for me it is crying on my way to work and sometimes home and NOT talking too much about it. I secretly keep hoping they will change their mind. 
  • Praying. 
  • Eating more than our share of corn dogs. Kam and I need to be submitted to a corn dog rehabilitation center. 
  • Getting new boots. Kam is still unsure that he likes them. I needed a change. I am sure he will come around. 
  • One word: Pinterest. 
  • Coloring pictures. 
  • Eating mint chocolate chip ice cream. I am still unsure as to how in the world I lost 10 pounds recently. I am just going to go with the whole concept of leave well enough alone. 
  • Giggling with my ladies. Ahhhh without them I would be so lost. I love all of you. 
  • Planning the Christmas decorations. I am so excited. 
  • Getting behind on the laundry. So behind that in one day I did 6 loads. 6. For two people!
  • Lighting the fall scented candles. 
  • Learning about return on investment. Cars backpack is proving to have a pretty good one. 
  • Reminding myself to breathe. Enjoy life. And blog more often. I feel better already. 

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Jean Pants

Kam is currently in a cowboy phase. He truly believes that he is a cowboy and in case you were wondering, it IS the cutest thing ever. He wakes up bright and early and picks out his own outfit which consists of "jean pants", a tee shirt, cowboy boots, and his cowboy hat. I have been learning a lot since we started this journey.  I have learned more than I ever thought possible. One area that has really been capitalized on is how to be a cowboy. If you were wondering what it takes to roam the wild west on a horse let me tell you.

  • No bubble baths. Cowboys in this day and age ONLY shower. They have apparently came a long way. All this time I thought they didn't shower at all. 
  • Cowboys wake up with the sun. They have a lot to do. 
  • When cowboys go to bed they must sleep with tractor blankets. 
  • Indoors is no place for a cowboy. They like to be outside chewing on a piece of grass looking off into the distance. 
  • "Jean pants" aren't a question. They are the answer. 
I hope that I have enlightened you with this information. I know I have been enlightened.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

"I love you from your toes to your face."

Today is the first day in over a week that I have been alone without Kam. He is with his dad having a ball and I am wandering around like a lost puppy dog. I had big plans for my mommy time, so far I have worked and thought about all my mommy time plans. I was going to spend some quality time with a book and in the hot tub, take extra long showers and listen to anything but Jason Aldean 'Big Green Tractor'. Needless to say I haven't done much but think about how quiet it is without him and count down the minutes until he comes back. Goodness I sound selfish. I am not. His daddy and him are probably loving every minute of it, which makes me feel good, however, I am still feeling like a lost puppy. 

When I was driving to work today I thought a lot about Kam. Nothing new there, but today I thought more about how amazing someone who is 3 feet tall can be. He has done so much for me and he has no idea. Kam has always been there for me and I know that our bond is strong enough that he will always be there for me and I will always be there for him. No matter what. He is the definition of love. My definition of love. That is what matters most. Everyday he reminds me to get up and be somebody. I am a lot of people. I am a daughter, sister, friend, aunt, boss, but the best someone I can be is his mommy. 

Kam sets such a strong example for me in so many ways. He reminds me to show emotion and let people know how I feel. I may not do this in the same way he sometimes does. (Screaming in Wal-Mart isn't really my cup of tea and hopefully it won't be his for much longer.) 

He teaches me that if I am happy say I am happy. If I am sad, exhausted or just upset, it is OK to cry. 

Saying I love you to someone is one of the most important things he reminds me to do. The way I feel when he tells me he loves me, makes me want to tell everyone close to me I love them, just so they can feel the warm feeling it offers. 

He teaches me to be artistic. Every color is a good one and everything should have lots of color. 

He shows me how to take responsibility for my actions. If I made the mess, clean it up. He cleans up his messes, so should I. 

Wake up in the morning and eat a giant bowl of sunshine for breakfast. I have never in my life known anyone to be as happy to be awake before dawn as he is. 

Be a friend. Be nice. Give big squeezes and wet kisses. 

Be a kid. 

I love you Kameron Christopher John. 

Don't change a thing about you. You are perfect the way you are. I grew you that way. 

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Christmas In July

OK so I am fully aware that it is July, but I would just like to let my family and friends know some things that I would like for Christmas. So here is some of my list. Keep in mind that what goes around comes around and I have already been conjuring up ideas for the people in my life. This list includes, but is not limited to,


  • A treadmill
  • Spa package
  • An Audi. With a warranty.
  • Red bottom heels.
  • Jessica Simpson luggage. The zebra print ones. 
  • Unlimited spray tans for a year, most spas have this option in their packages, refer to number 2 on the list. 
  • Nordstroms gift card. 
  • Fridge for my wine. 
  • Last but not least, a winning lottery ticket.
I would like to say thank you in advance. I cannot wait to feel the joy this Christmas season pour over me when I see these gifts under my tree. I would also like to let you know that I am open to ideas and suggestions as to what you would like to receive this year. Like I said what goes around comes around. :)

Monday, July 18, 2011

Turning the Page...finally...

I must be doing something right. For those of you who don't know, I finally got a job in Idaho Falls. I am so ready. I have never been so excited to move over 100 miles in my life. I have never been so excited to MOVE in my entire life. OK on to the good stuff. The details. (I am sick of repeating myself on what is going on so if you would like to know...please continue reading.)

I got a job working for American Eagle as an assistant manager in the Idaho Falls mall. I am hoping to only be an assistant for a year and work my way up to being the store manager. Kam and I will be staying in Rigby for 2 weeks with only our necessities, until I can find a place to live. We will be living in Rigby so my amazing sister can babysit Kam. My sister is so amazing, (I am sure hearing that never gets old to her.) she was able to pull some strings and get Kam into a preschool class that starts in September. Her kids go to it and they absolutely love it.

Kam is handling everything very well. I thought I was excited, but he has me beat by far. He continually asks if we can live on Aunt Carrie's road so he can ride his bike. I asked if he could finance the home loan for me and he said yes. I told him we would further the discussion in 2 years. :)

Everything is moving along great. I am hoping it continues this way. I couldn't be happier right now. Wish us luck in our new journey!

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Until Further Notice

I believe in perfect timing. I always have and I always will.

I also believe that good things fall apart and better things fall together.

Life is funny sometimes. Just when you think you have everything figured out something happens and you look at things very differently.

I have been reminding myself a lot lately that everything happens for a reason. One day it will all work out.

So until further notice,

CELEBRATE EVERYTHING.

Monday, July 11, 2011

I Had The Best Day With You Today...

Some days are extra special with Kam. Today was one of them. I don't know exactly what it is that makes some of our days more special than others, but it happens, and when it does I love it.

Today started like any other Monday. Hectic. I was only 5 minutes late to work though. It could have been worse and it has been worse trust me. Kam went off to daycare and I went to work. After daycare I took Kam to get a slurpee from 7-11. They were giving out free ones so we decided we should go get one. By 5:00 the free ones were all gone, we of course got there at 5:15. There was no way I could tell Kam no after I had him all hyped up for it the whole way there so we got some anyway. He was so happy! An 8oz slurpee made him feel like the luckiest little boy ever, and I felt like the best mommy ever.

When we got home Kam went to his friends houses to see if any of them were home. A sad and bored little Kam quickly discovered that not a single one of his friends were home. This actually excited me a little bit. This meant I got to spend some one on one time with him. (Something we both needed after a long weekend in Rigby.) We made an awesome dinner of crabby patties, salad and fresh fruit.

When we were getting dinner ready Kam and I were practicing counting with baby carrots and hamburger buns when he asked why there was only 2 of us. I said "1, 2, me and you! That's just how it is there is 2 of us here!" Kam looked up at me and said "I wish I had a daddy at this house." I of course started to tear up, leaned down gave him a squeeze and said "Well with a mommy like me you don't need a daddy at 2 houses. We manage to do alright. One day you will have a daddy at both of your houses, but we have to wait until everything is just right." This little comment, or wish if you may, made me think. I told myself that I had to find the silver lining and couldn't let it get me down.

After dinner Kam and I went outside and played soccvolleybasketfootball. It was so much fun. We got to see two dragonflies and had a tickle fight. After we were all wore out we laid out on the grass and looked at the sky. It started to rain about three minutes after we were lying there. Instead of freaking out and running inside I let Kam lay there and LAUGH at the raindrops. Within no time at all we were both laying in the rain laughing our butts off. I am sure the neighbors think I am crazy, and that my son is taking after me, but it doesn't matter. We enjoyed every minute of it.

Tonight when Kam said his bedtime prayer, almost all by himself, he once more thanked God for his mommy. When I tucked him in he proceeded to tell me that he loves everything about me. After shutting his door I sat there and smiled. The silver lining to him not having a two parents at each house is that I have him all to myself on nights like tonight. I know that it might not always be easy, but it has always been worth it. Always. I can only hope that one day when he is older he can look back and know that his mommy loves him and would do anything for him. That is why there is only me at this house. I don't want to share him and his sweet self...yet. :)

Thanks for today Kam. I had the best day with you today.

Not a care in the world. . .

Friday, July 8, 2011

What Have We Been Up To

Kam and I have been extremely busy the past week or so. Jess and I did our first craft booth. We learned the hard way that procrastination is NOT key. We drank lots of coffee and had 1 too many late nights. By late I mean sewing blankets until 3:00 AM. Not the best idea. That took up a lot of my time. A lot.

We spent the 4th in Malad with my family. It was supposed to be a 2 night stay, which turned into a 5 night stay. The tags on my car expired on Friday the 1st. I went to the courthouse (In Malad) Friday at 4:47. They close at 4:45. Is this some sort of sick joke?! Nope. The woman was very rude and was more interested in calling in her fried chicken order to Thomas Market than even acknowledging my presence. Since it was a holiday weekend I decided to just stay in Malad rather than drive through Utah with expired tags. This meant that I would have to stay until Tuesday morning to get them taken care of. I hope her fried chicken was worth it. I am still frustrated.

My sister, Carrie, and her family came to Malad which was fun because the cousins got to play together. Kam cannot get enough of his cousins. Jason loves him so much. It is adorable to watch Jason follow "Mameron" around. That was one plus to staying an extra 3 nights. Too bad they left for Rigby on Sunday which left me for 2 more nights and nobody to keep me entertained.

The parade was on Monday and Kam loved every minute of that. He made out pretty darn good as far as the amount of candy he got. His little Elmo bucket was full. He even got an otter pop and a bottle of water. The throwing of the water bottles was a bit concerning to me. They were throwing them pretty hard and the audience consisted mostly of small children. Big red flag? Yeah I thought so. Later that day I found Kam in a candy coma passed out on the living room floor. In his boxers. Surrounded by candy wrappers. He had a high fructose corn syrup crash apparently.

By the time Tuesday rolled around I was ready to get the hell out of dodge. I got my car registered by the woman who loves fried chicken and jetted for Logan. **I left out the small part that while in Malad my eyes were extremely itchy and red. What I thought was allergies.** I met Kam's dad at my work and they took him for his days with daddy. I sat in the parking lot for a few minutes thinking about my extreme eye conditions. It was bad. I thought I better go to the doctor since pink eye has been going around Malad and I am extremely paranoid. $150 later the doctor has a prescription for some antibiotics and told me to "treat it like pink eye since I was exposed." There was however, a small chance that it could be an infection from wearing my contacts too much with all the allergies. So here I am sitting at the urgent care thinking "of all the weekends to contract some highly contagious infection, it had to be the one that I was around a gazillion people. Awesome." My work told me that I couldn't work until it was taken care of, which is 5 days, which means a week off work. So here I am, no work, no Kam, and noooo desire to pick up a craft project after that booth. So I napped. A lot. It was amazing.

That is the past 2 weeks in a giant nutshell. Now here are some pictures for your viewing pleasure.

Remember that Mother's Day flower Kam gave me? The flower that had 1 tiny little flower blooming on it? Well this is it now. I am so proud I can not only keep Kam alive for as long as I have, but I can also turn that tiny little flower into this masterpiece!!!

My mohawked little guy chowing down on 1 of the 5 dozen cookies we baked. I love him so much.
Happy Birthday America!!!

Thursday, July 7, 2011

So You Say What You Are Happy To Have

A few weeks ago Kam and I attended church. First time in (I hate to say this) almost 3 years. Kam is still getting the hang of the whole prayer thing. He hates folding his arms and refuses to close his eyes. Shouting "AMEN!" at the top of his lungs after the prayer oh he is all over it. I decided that since I pray every night before bed, I should introduce him to bedtime prayer also. Tonight was the first night. This is how it went.

"Ok Kam we are going to say bedtime prayers tonight" "Why?" "So you can tell God what you are thankful for and ask him for help if you need any." Kam is climbing into his recliner in his room at this point and I am kneeling at his bed. "Kam come over here and kneel down with me." "Why?" "That is just how you say a prayer." Reluctantly climbing out of his recliner "Why?" By now I am beginning to wonder if we are playing 20 questions. "It is just how you do it Kam. Now put your hands like this and I want you to think of anything that you are happy to have." "Why?" "So think about anything that you are happy to have and we will tell God thank you for giving it to us." "I donno mommy" "OK I will start the prayer...You say what I say. Dear Heavenly Father..." "Dear Heabenewy Faduu" "I am thankful for..." I am getting a blank stare at this point. "So say what you are happy to have Kam" Blank stare. "So say what you are happy to have." "You. I'm happy about you." Tears are welling up in my eyes. "I am thankful for my mommy..." "I am tankfoool fo my mommy." "OK what else..." "Ummmm my bed." "I am thankful to have a warm bed to sleep in..." "I am tankfool to hab a warm bed to sweep in." "Is there anything else Kam?" "Ummm no." "I say these things...." Getting cut off by a very eager Kam at this point, "IN HEABENEWY FADDER AMEN!!!"

Overall I think it was a pretty good first bedtime prayer with mommy. He never ceases to amaze me with his gratitude. When he told me he was happy about me I almost lost it. (OK I did lose it. Just a little.) It made me feel so warm and fuzzy to know that someone is thankful enough about me in their life they told God.

"It is not a slight thing when those that are so fresh from God, love us in return." -Charles Dickens

Monday, June 27, 2011

It Is About That Time Again....

The time that I have a few glasses of wine and let loose. Talk talk talk. This is actually the 2nd time this week I have found myself indulging and enjoying a glass, or 3, of wine. Thank you Jess. Usually my bullet pointed lists are compilations of totally amazing, happy, tear jerking things that I think of. Not tonight. I don't know if it is the zinfandel or the fact that I have had a lot of stress lately (those of you in my closest circle understand), but tonight I am feeling a bit sassy so I have decided to make a list of...

Things that make me go ughhhh.
  • Total lack of originality. Really just be yourself.
  • Bills. Go away. Is there a bill hell that mine can go to?
  • People dressing completely inappropriately for their age and/or weight.
  • Idiotic drivers. Especially ones that have kids in the car.
  • When I make a delicious pot of coffee and realize that I am completely out of creamer.
  • Facebook. I am so glad that is out of my life.
  • Dirty people. Not so much the germ people that are unaware of how to use hand sanitizer (although that is disgusting) but people that live in their own filth. Do your damn dishes.
  • Dishonesty. Just be real.
  • People that complain all the time about something, but yet do nothing to change it. If you think you are fat STOP eating at McDonalds.
  • Fake people. If you don't like me, don't kiss my butt. Tell me the truth. Chances are I don't care for you either.
  • Mustard. I have tried it once. This year. It was OK. Watching Kam spoon it off his plate makes me gag though. Same goes for pickles. Sorry Shay I know that those 2 things make up your food pyramid.
  • Paying to do my laundry. For a person that has OCD that shit adds up.
  • The person that pretends to have a perfect life. We all know you fight with your spouse and cry sometimes too. It's normal human behavior.
  • Flakey people. Holy crap. Biggest pet peeve EVER. Follow up and follow through.
  • Wearing way too much bronzer. You look orange. Stop that.
  • The annoying teenagers that fly through neighborhoods going ridiculous speeds. Hello it is a neighborhood not the drag strip. There are children around. Not to mention sleeping children. That is a sacred thing. So turn the damn gangster rap down too. Your system isn't that cool .
  • Clerks at stores that do not talk to you. I am here to give you my business aka my money. Acknowledge me.
  • Mud. Need I say more.
  • That person that complains about money, yet has new stuff all the freaking time.
  • People that stare at my tattoos. I know they are there. I also know they are beautiful and a part of me. No need to gawk at them.
  • Wood pencils. The number 2 pencil. The sound they make gives me the chills.
  • Gossip. Not to mention the people that start and stir the pot. Get a life. Talk about wasted energy.
  • Women that touch a pregnant woman's belly. I was once pregnant and did not want to be touched. This drove me nuts.
  • The conversation that goes like this ..... "so when did you and Kam's dad get a divorce?" "Oh we were never married." "You were never married?" Hello I just said that do I need to repeat myself. Really? Or this one ...... "So what does your husband do?" "I'm not married." "So you aren't married?" Good grief. For the record I am a single mom. I have been the whole time. I like it this way and think it is God's plan for me. Don't be so surprised to find out that I am not, nor have I ever been married. And don't look at me like a deer in head lights when you find out that I haven't been. Or ask a rhetorical question about it.
  • Snookie. That girl drives me nuts. I don't know if it is her pickle fetish, the fact that she had a terrible book that I would never ever pay for published, the oompa loompa spray tan, or the hair that bugs me. Could be a combo of all of it. Either way I can't stand her.
  • Smart phones. I know I have one, and that thing is taking over my life.
That is all the complaining I have for now. Hopefully I got it all out of my system so I don't feel the need to rant like that for awhile. I feel better now though. Time for happy thoughts.

Friday, June 24, 2011

Remember that time we went to the zoo?

Well here are the pictures. :)

The boys when we first got there.

The STRANGEST bird I have ever seen. Ever.


An excited Kam. (despite the rain)

Venturing over to see the peacock. LaChelle was so afraid she wouldn't even come close to get a picture. :)

Feeding the ducks.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Thank You For That

I feel like with all the hustling I do on a daily basis I sometimes forget to say a simple thank you to those who mean the most and do the most for me. So here is a thank you to all those that help me, inspire me, coach me, guide me, and listen to me.

Kam,
Thank you for giving my life purpose. You are such a tiny little person and yet you do such big things for me. You remind me to look at the little things life has to offer and always to keep a smile on. You are the reason I get out of bed every day, and get through the day. You give me drive. I love you more than I ever thought possible and I am so lucky that you are you, because you make me, me!
Thank you for that.

Mom and Dad,
Thank you for always, no matter what, putting up with me. You guys know the real meaning of unconditional love and show it to me everyday. I know that I haven't been the easiest one to raise, but it has been fun. Thank you for being there for me when I need it most. I couldn't have done what I have done as a single mother if it weren't for you.
Thank you for that.

Carrie,
You have been the best sister anyone could ever ask for. Thank you for always offering your advice, even though it sometimes takes me years to listen to it. You are patient with me, as well as everyone else and that sets such a great example for me. Thank you for always being honest with me and telling me not what I want to hear, but what I need to hear. I know I am always welcome at your home and that there will always be great food to enjoy.
Thank you for that.


Trevor and Kylie,
Thank you for allowing us to establish such a great relationship with one another for Kam. Thank you for being such a huge part of Kam's life. I am so fortunate to have the situation I do as a single mother and because of you guys it is possible. I love when people ask about the situation and all I can do is smile and genuinely say "It is the best thing. Kam has a lot of people who love him."
Thank you for that.

All my friends,
Thank you for no matter what being there for me. I have been blessed with the best. Shaylise, Jessica, Lachelle, Jackie, and sooo many more I hope that I can be there for you just like you have been for me. Thank you for always being true. Through thick and thin. No matter what I know that you are a phone call away.
Thank you for that.

God,
Thank you for trusting me so much. No matter how hard things get I know that with you anything is possible. Thank you for guiding me and helping me get through so much. You have blessed me with the greatest people to share my life with.
Thank you for that.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

And he thinks we are just fishing. . .



Now that the weather is nice (some of the time) Kam and I have been fishing twice. He loves it. I love it. OK let me clarify. I love getting out of the house, it is something different than we are used to doing, and if we catch something and my dad or brother are around to take care of the river monster once it is out of the water and my mom is able to prepare it, we have dinner! It makes me feel primitive. In a way. Talk about being the bread winner in the household.

The first time we went was last weekend and we went with my family. Thank heaven for my brother and dad. I would have had no clue what to do with the fish once they hit land. Don't even get me started on getting those hooks out of their mouths, or in some cases their stomachs. My dad caught 6 fish! This is something that happens once every ten years I think. This is just a judgement based on how excited he was, not to mention cocky.  




 This last weekend we went to Rigby with my sister and her family to a free fishing day just for kids. We did not catch anything. Wait, I take that back. Jason caught a sucker fish. That was all though. Kids had fun. It was good for them to all get together and play. 4 kids means 4 fishing poles. Which means a very high probability of lines getting tangles, hooks getting stuck in shirts, and lost bait. It was a very stressful trip. Kam and his cousins had a blast though and that is all that matters.

Kam and I putting a smile on for the camera. Moments after this was taken my stress levels were so high I was asking myself why I didn't bring my vodka.

All the kids at the free fishing day.


I saved the best one for last! This is my proud dad with one of his fish. I thought I better take one so that there is some proof that he actually caught some. Not to mention a quick reference for him to rub it in my little brothers face that he totally kicked his butt that day.

 
Happy Fathers Day Dad!!!


Saturday, June 11, 2011

Lock Up Your Daughters!

The other day Kam and I were outside when one of the neighbor girls who is older (like 6) told me that Kam is "sooo cute". She said this with a giggle. I was concerned. He is only 3 and the older women already totally dig him. Lord have mercy.

Nuff said....

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

What I Loved Today

I seriously cannot help but think how lucky I am. Today was another one of those days that I realized how blessed I am. The things that made me all warm and fuzzy this week {so far} are as follows... :)

  • I woke up on the right side of my cozy bed today.
  • I found a fun sized Twix in my drawer when I was packing my lunch.
  • Looked through the pictures of Kam and I and cried when I put them up around my house because I realized that he is growing up right before my eyes.
  • Night time phone calls. I don't think they will ever get old. Ever.
  • Picking up Kam from daycare and him running up to me yelling "Mommy! Mommy!" Followed with and incredibly wet kiss on the cheek when I picked him up.
  • The smell of a fresh cantaloupe.
  • Craft nights that go into the early mornings.
  • Watching Kam play with his little friends outside and learning things like throwing toys over the fence into the neighbors yard is not a good idea.
  • The smell of the rain. The sound of the rain.
  • Making people laugh.
  • Homemade ice cream.
  • Going to bed at night knowing that tomorrow is going to be another great day surrounded by great people.

my hobby...

It has been so nice to be back on a set schedule with work. I finally have time to devote to my hobbies. I am beginning to think I may have too many though.

I have been doing a lot of this lately....




I am trying my hardest to pull this box out more often. This is my sewing box.
 Lets just say sewing isn't exactly my forte.

Sunday, June 5, 2011

picture time!

Recently my good friend took some pictures of Kam and I. They turned out so great. It was a windy, overcast day and we were both worried that they may not turn out that great, but with a kid as cute as Kam it was a success. Chelsey has a great eye and got some amazing shots. Here are some of my favorites. (All of them were awesome it was hard to pnly pick a few to put on here!)

















If you would like any pictures by her I think it would be a great idea. :) Her blog is http://www.chelseylinphotography.blogspot.com/ or you can e-mail her at chelseylinphotography@gmail.com

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Pounding the Pavement

I went running tonight. First time since last summer. This is how it went. . .

Did I stretch before the run? Yes.
Did I stretch enough? No.
Did I feel like dying? Yes.
Did I die? No.
Did I have to stop and walk a little bit? Yes.
Did I give up? No.
Did I wear the right clothing? Yes.
Did I look as good as the celebs do while running? No.
Did I sweat like the celebs? Yes.
Did I really care what I looked like ultimately? No.
Did I eat too much pasta for dinner? Yes.
Did I puke? No.
Did I consider puking so I would have an excuse to quit? Yes.
Did I quit? No.
Did I give it my all and then some? YES.
Could I have done it if I was still a smoker? ABSOLUTELY NOT.

My smoke free lungs did it! I did it! I am so proud of myself. It wasn't far. Maybe 1.5 miles, but I did it. I can't wait to do it again. When I ran cross country in high school I could run 9 miles. Since having Kam I stopped running. No more excuses for this girl. It is on!

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Look Mom! No hands!

On Monday Kam and I went to Wal-Mart for a bottle of lotion and left with a bike. That little stinker gave me those puppy dog eyes in the middle of the bike aisle and I couldn't say no. I just couldn't. I also considered how awesome it would feel to get the 'Best Mom of the Year' award from him and knew that it would be worth it. He was so excited. So excited. I can't even put into words how happy he was that day. As soon as we got to our house he jumped on and rode it over to the playground area where some of his little friends were playing and just kept yelling at the top of his lungs "Hi guys! Hi! Look! Look! I got a new bike!" Watching how excited he was was the best feeling ever. He was so darn cute showing all the little boys his new ride. In a way I felt like it was a preview to him in 15 years showing off his first truck.

The first night he slept with it in his room. Parked next to the bed. I am quite surprised he didn't name it. The next morning we had to leave the house fairly early to go meet his dad by 9:15. Who needs an alarm though when your 3 year old comes riding in your bedroom at 7:07 saying "I tink that my friends are outside payin. I better go out there." With a lot of persuading I convinced him that it was best that we wait until at least 8:00 to go outside. To keep himself busy, he rode up and down the hallway, and ate his breakfast on the bike. His dad took him to get a helmet that he absolutely loves. It is bright blue and has fish on it. He loves it almost as much as he loves the bike. He wore that all night tonight even when he wasn't riding his bike.


Exhibit A: wearing the helmet at dinner.

Watching how happy and how grateful he is about his brand new bike makes me smile. He told me the whole way home after getting it how much he loved me and kept on saying "tanks for my brand new bike mommy."

Sunday, May 29, 2011

prayer...

I usually keep my spiritual views to myself, but I had to share this. I recently bought a book titled Heaven is for Real. It is about a little boy who takes a short trip to heaven and discusses what he was witness to over the next few months and years. His dad is a pastor and wrote the book. This book is an amazing read. I found myself getting the chills and crying the whole way through it.

One thing that it discussed in the book is the love that Jesus has for the children. It also makes mention that God knows where he puts children in a family. That made me think back to when Kameron was just a baby my mom made mention that God knew I would need a well behaved child because he knew I would be doing a lot on my own. Everything happens for a reason. Everything. This is my personal experience that made me realize that God is real, miracles happen, and prayers are answered.

When I was 19 I found myself very scared and very pregnant. I had no idea what to do and where to begin. One of the first things I did was pray that everything would work out. I later found out that my sister had also said a prayer asking that I would get my life on the right track and that my uncle Mike would be able to have a baby of his own soon. My uncle Mike (my moms brother) had been married for years to a great wife, had a successful job, but no children. They had been hoping to adopt, but were having no such luck. Several family members had made suggestions to me that adopting my baby to Mike could be an option. Something told me no however. I love my uncle Mike and can't even imagine the struggles involved in failed adoptions, but there was no way I could give my child up for adoption, even if it was to Mike.

Shortly after having found out that I was expecting, my sister Carrie opened her home to me and I found myself working 2 jobs in the mall in Idaho Falls in an attempt to save money for my own place for Kam and I. One of the jobs was at a maternity store working for the absolute worst management team ever. It was a job though and I was in desperate need for the money so I stuck it out until the late part of my pregnancy.

One Sunday I got a phone call from the maternity store asking if I could cover a shift for the store manager. She was sick and in the hospital. I was reluctant seeing as how I was working usually 9 days in a row, sometimes more, and a day off was hard to come by. I decided I should take it up though, so I got ready and headed into work. After a few hours had passed by a girl came in with her daughter looking for some maternity clothes. We were making small talk about having babies (a common occurrence between two pregnant women) when she told me that she wasn't excited at all about having the baby. It would be her 3rd child and this one was in no way planned. Her plans were to adopt the baby to a loving family that she knew could provide for the child in a way that she wasn't capable of. In a leap of faith I made mention to her about my uncle. I remember saying "You are going to think I am crazy, but I might know of somebody. I understand if you say no, but here is an idea..." I briefly told her about my uncles struggles and that I turned down the suggested idea to give my baby to him. Next thing I know I have a complete strangers name and phone number written on a post it note and instructions to give it to him so they could get in touch.

I called my sister and my mom almost immediately to make sure I hadn't overstepped any boundaries by doing this and made sure I had the correct number for Mike so I could tell him what had happened. I made the phone call that night. They got in touch with one another and what happened?... She picked them. She picked THEM! After all these years a discussion about maternity pants led to my uncle and his wife getting their child. She gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and did the most selfless thing anyone can do. She made my uncle the dad that he had been waiting to be his whole life. I find it quite ironic that she was born early and it just so happens that she was born on my birthday.

Miracles are everywhere. Sometimes we just have to look at things a little differently to see them. If my boss hadn't been in the hospital I wouldn't have been at work that day when she walked in. I made mention that my sister had said a prayer for Mike and myself, I believe that was the reason I got called into work and got this strange and bold idea to tell this complete stranger about my uncle. I was getting my life on track for my baby, who I knew I couldn't give up for adoption, when a miracle happened. God gave us both children that are perfect for us.  Prayers are answered, even if it is months later in a maternity shop. Ask and you shall receive.

Friday, May 27, 2011

how coincidental....

My phone has an app on it just for quotes. There is hundreds of them and it has a new one on there every day. Today's quote was this,

"Your children need your presence more than your presents." -Jesse Jackson

Lately I have been reevaluating my job. I love working with people and making them feel good about themselves, my coworkers are great, and it is fun to be around one of my favortie things, CLOTHES! However, my favorite thing in the whole wide world is my son and retail hours makes it hard to spend time with family sometimes. I told myself last fall I was going to walk away from retail for good and where did I wind up just 6 months later?...in a department store!

Money talks. Unfortunately it cannot and will not buy happiness. After a a lot of thought and input from my family I decided to go back to my old job. It is more flexible, better hours and just a nickle, dime, and quarter less an hour. Worth it? I vote yes.

Monday, May 23, 2011

A Small Reminder

Lately I have been finding lots of things that make me smile. Just in case you wanted to know what those were, here they are.

  • Spending time with my closest friends.
  • Getting tickled by Kam.
  • Finding 'the nook' after a long day and falling asleep. (For those of you who watch Sex and the City, you know exactly what the nook is and how important it is.)
  • Craft nights with Jess.
  • Bedtime phone calls to discuss absolutely nothing in particular, but to always say goodnight.
  • Spending time at my parents house.
  • The smell of a new book.
  • Asking questions and getting an answer that takes a weight off my shoulders.
  • Working out with LaChelle.
  • Taking goodie plates to the neighbors.
  • Watching my 2 favorite people on the seesaw together.
  • Chit chat with Shay in the salon.
  • Fresh fruit. The good stuff is finally in season and I couldn't be happier about that.
  • Waking up a few minutes before my alarm.
  • The much needed and anticipated long kiss.  :)

Sunday, May 22, 2011

My Thoughts On Today

I had today off work and was able to spend it with Kam. It started at 7:20 when I wake up to Kam YELLING at the top of his lungs "Mom!!! I need you to come wipe me!....MOM! Wipe my butt!" I have no problem wiping my son's butt, but 1st thing in the morning. Really?! I haven't even had my coffee yet. As soon as I get in there to help him out he looks at me and says "we need to get ready to go to the zoo." My response, "Well Kam, we will get ready but we aren't going to the zoo for about 4 more hours."

Fast forward to noon. We are at the zoo with my friend LaChelle and her little boy Trindon. It is raining. For those of you who haven't ever pushed a stroller while holding an umbrella it is not an easy task. LaChelle and I were trying to figure out ways to stick our umbrellas down our shirts. Didn't work. The kids had so much fun though. Kam said his favorite part was the deer. Lachelle was extremely freaked out by the peacock. I tried teaching Kam the Katy Perry song but then decided it was somewhat inappropriate. Trindon was so excited about feeding the ducks he just sat right down in front of them on the soaking wet ground. Overall good trip. Pictures will be posted soon.

Snuggled up with Kam and took our Sunday afternoon nap when we got home. We did a lot of playing outside this afternoon. I made an extremely large amount of spaghetti for dinner and way too much garlic bread. It was also very yummy so I am OK with the amount of carbs I have sitting in my fridge waiting to be eaten as leftovers tomorrow. When I was cleaning out my fridge I found some hard boiled eggs from Easter. Made me wonder if they are still good to eat. As of right now I am still unsure so they are still in there taking up space.

Kam took a huge bubble bath and sang to himself the whole time. His song went something like this..."sitting on a fence post.....chewing on some....bubble gum....watching the....tractor in the field....oh oh oh..." When I asked him about it he claimed it was just him talking to himself. When I got him out of the tub and was getting him ready for bed, he pointed to his toy mailbox and informs me that he checks his mailbox everyday and there is never any mail in there. This comment made my heart break a little because we have had this mail box since he was around 18 months old. So for who knows how long he has been checking his mailbox only to be let down every time.

Sorry to cut you short, but I need to go write a love letter to Kam and stick it in the mail in hopes that it will reach him tomorrow.   :)

Thursday, May 19, 2011

What's In a Name

So tonight I was able to come up to Malad and spend some time with my dad's family. My whole family including all my extended family, which doesn't happen all but once a year. Unfortunately the circumstances were not the best. We were all gathered for my aunt Sandy's viewing. While it is very hard and sad to see a family member go, it was also very bittersweet. We sat around for hours tonight telling stories, sharing memories, and talking about the "good ol' days". Most of the tears were happy tears from laughing when hearing the stories that were told.

After listening to the stories and memories I couldn't help but think to myself  how I am so damn proud to have my name and be a part of this family. I realized tonight that I come from a special group of women and I had no clue how many of their traits I have.

When I was born my babysitter told my mom "she was handpicked by Merle". My Grandma Merle is my dad's mother that I never had the chance to meet. Some of the stories that I have heard make her out to be quite the woman. I love hearing my dad talk about her.

The summer of 2002 I did horse 4-H and the instructor told me that she couldn't believe how much I resembled my aunt Les on my horse. She said that I rode exactly like her. Les was always so friendly and always wanted to know how everyone was doing and cared about others well being so much. One memory I have of her is when I was 3 and had my surgery I remember her and my cousins coming to the hospital to see me and bringing me a toy to help cheer me up.

My aunt Sandy was always the life of the party. Such a social butterfly. Sound familiar?...thought so. :) Her home was always open to family and friends. Her motto was the more the merrier. I know that heaven just got a lot more lively with her up there running around making sure that everyone is having a good time.

Wendy is my dad's youngest sibling, and the one I think I have the most in common with. We are both very head strong and know what we want. She told me a story tonight about her and my dad. They got into a fight and he tried telling her what she should do. Her reply was I hope you are blessed with a daughter just like me to give you hell. Well here I am and havoc I have reeked.

I found it so amusing that Kam and I had a conversation that goes as follows on our way to Malad.

Me "OK Kam we have to hurry so fast when we get home to get our stuff ready to go to Malad."
Kam "Well I have a question really fast."
Me "Yes baby what is it?"
Kam "Is your name Mattie John?"
Me "Yes."
Kam "Why isn't it Mattie Mecham?" (That is his Dad's last name.)
Me "Well I didn't marry daddy so I still have my name. When I do get married I will get a different last name though. I like my name though so I don't mind."
Kam "Well I could marry you huh? But mom I want to marry Corona." (Corona is Tyson's pit bull.)
Me "Oh my heck Kam. Where did you come from?!?"
Kam "I thought I came from you!"

It is true Kam, you did come from me, and I came from a great family. I see so much of my dad's personality in Kam. The strong, stubborn, fun loving, proud, feisty, get it done attitude, and so much more. Watching Kam do little things like stick his tongue out when hes concentrating on something I can't help but think this is what Grandma Merle watched years ago.

I am so PROUD to be a John and be the woman I am.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

What do ya know...another list. :)

I saw this on one of my friends friends' blogs. Loved it. Smiled when I read it. Thought about a lot while reading. You get the idea. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's okay to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistant is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up your future.
12. It's okay to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful, or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles and wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save if for a special occasion.
Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words "In five years, will this matter?"
27.Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
35. Growing old beats dying young.
36. Your children get only one childhood.
37. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
38. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
39.If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone elses, we'd grab ours back.
40. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
41. The best is yet to come.
42. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
43. Yield.
44. Friends are the family that we choose for ourselves
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Facebook: A place where good habits go to die.

I made the decision to delete my facebook account the other day. I spent way too much time on there and got very tired of listening to everyone obsessively complaining about their life and the weather. I figured what is the big deal. I have a blog, an e-mail address, and that thing called a phone. Now I know that the ol' phone call is out dated, I almost forgot how to use the phone for its intended purposes because of the damn facebook app that I was severely addicted to. Really though time for a reality check.

Today marks 3 days no facebook. It has been weird not knowing what everyone is doing, eating, how their bowel movements are, where they are, and how pissed they are that it is windy outside. BUT, I have noticed how much more productive I am and when I went out with some friends last night I was able to have a conversation without annoying interruptions from my phone alerting me that someone sent me a farmville request.

Kam has my full attention now all the time. The main thing that made me consider deleting it was when I took Kam to play at the playground and realized I wasn't even playing I was talking to people on facebook! I was so mad at myself. that night I made my last post, gave my e-mail address and blog link to a few people and hit deactivate. It hurt so good! I can't wait to see what I can get done now!

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

sh*t my son says

Justin Halpern wrote a book about conversations with his father titled 'Shit my dad says'. It is absolutely, positively hilarious. It causes laughing until your cheeks hurt and you are crying. In other words it is a great read.


Justin inspired me to do this post. Kam says some of the most interesting things. Not a day goes by that I don't find myself staring at the ceiling trying to remain calm and not start hysterically laughing. I have started to write some of his comments, questions and our conversations down so I can refer to them when I need a good laugh. Here are some of my favorites....

  • "Lets go buy a John Deere today."
  • "Well we could just have brownies for dinner tonight"
  • Me: "Kam what is the most important thing I have taught you?" Kam: " "The most important ting you have done to me is make me eat all my pancakes and to always tell you what I am doing in my bedroom."
  • Kam: "Is it my birthday today?" Me: "No. Not for 9 months." Kam: "I could get a present today too though huh?! That sounds like fun."
  • "We need to get the mail today. There might be some new coupons in there"
  • Kam: "So there is a baby in your belly?" Jess: "Yup! Then when the baby gets big he will pop right out of my belly button!" Kam: (Pointing to her boobs) "So is there some babies in there too?"
  • "My noodoos are neat. My bowl is neat. Everything is actually pretty neat Mom."
  • Kam: "Are you sick?" Me: (Just finishing a 2 minute coughing session) "Yeah I am sick. I actually feel like crap." Kam: "Yeah I feel like manure."

Sunday, May 8, 2011

mommyhood


Seeing as how it is  Mother's Day today and my blog is titled 'Mommy and Kam' I find it fitting to do a post about my experiences as a mother so far. Where to even begin? I guess I will tell the events that took place on Mother's Day 2011.

It started at 6:00 in the morning. Kam comes into my room in his underwear and socks holding 3 blankets and his Buzz Lightyear doll and says to me "Mommy I think I had an accident." OK let me back up a little bit. Let's go back to 10:45 the night before. Kam and I get home. He had been with Grandpa all day and I had been at work. We were both so exhausted by the time we got home, actually Kam had passed out 15 miles before even getting there. I grabbed my keys and my phone and heaved Kam into our house. Kam was so comatose that I couldn't even get him to sit up to take his sweatshirt off. I left his socks and underwear on and called it good. I went into my room layed down on my bed in my work clothes, shoes on, and contacts in. That was the end of it. I was so exhausted I left lights on and the front door unlocked. Next thing I know it is 6:07 in the morning and I am presented with a mess.

Happy Mother's Day I thought to myself. I get Kam cleaned up and in my bed and explained to him that it is still early and we need to go back to sleep. I was lucky enough that for once in the history of Kam's life he slept until 9:52. We woke up to my dad calling me and couldn't believe what time it was. Talk about a great Mother's day present...SLEEP! Can this day get any better... Yes. Yes it can. I did the usual glamorous things involved in being a mom, 3 loads of laundry, scrubbed the bath tub, did the dishes, vacuumed the house, went to the store, etc. Somewhere in the mix of the day Kam presented me with the 2nd part of his great gift. He wiped his own bum when he pooped. By this point I am thinking "How did I get so lucky? Kam let me sleep and wiped his own butt. Amazing. Just amazing. Can it be Mother's Day everyday?..."  I am still on cloud 9. So that was my experience as a single mom on Mother's day 2011.

I knew that Kam would give me hell within the first 30 minutes of having him home. He decided to pee in the middle of his first diaper change. It was everywhere. His little face, his 'coming home outfit', my clothes, and the wall. He just looked at me and had a funny face. I knew I was in for it with this little dude. This is what I have learned so far from mommyhood.

  • As a mother you have to make a lot of sacrifices. Good sacrifices though. Sacrifices to ensure your child is happy and well taken care of. Just the other day I found myself holding my hand out the window with a half melted candy trying to get the cold air to make it edible. By the end of it my hand was ice, the candy was not so "melty", and Kam was happy as ever chowing down in the back seat. Every sacrifice big and small is worth it though.
  • Sleep is for the weak. I usually get to bed after midnight and I am up between 7 and 8. Unless it is Mother's day I am up at 6:00. My coffee pot is always armed and ready when I go to bed at night so I can flip the on switch in the morning.
  • Messes happen. Deal with it. I have found many interesting things waiting for me thanks to Kam's curiosity. One morning my whole entire spice drawer was filled to the brim with every spice, seasoning, bottle of vanilla extract and taco seasoning packet I had in the house. Kam didn't really have an explanation for that one. I didn't give him time to give me one he was sent to his room so fast.
  • Kids are like sponges. Monkey see monkey do. When Kam was 2 I hear him in the kitchen playing. Next thing I hear is his sweet tiny little voice saying "damnit". I wanted to cry. I also wanted to kick my own butt for letting his ears hear that word.
  • Boys will be boys. I will never forget the first time I witnessed Kam peeing outside. Pants down, facing a tree, and his little tiny butt cheeks getting some sun. When I asked him about it his response was that Daddy and Grandpa do it too.
  • When they are sick, you are sick and your life shuts down for a few days. It will be back up and running just fine. Try to stay sane for this time frame.
  • When Kam was born, I was born. The mother was born. Together, step by step we are learning.
  • I would not change a thing. Kam is my life. I don't know what I would do or who I would be without him.

Happy Mother's Day to all the mums out there. Especially mine! Without her, I wouldn't be the mom I am today!


Friday, May 6, 2011

Castle In The Sky

Recently Kameron's great grandma Ricker passed. (This was his dad's grandmother) Before going to the funeral I didn't really tell Kam too much about why he was going. Death for me is a touchy subject and seeing as how it was a loss on his dad's side of the family I wanted them to tell him about it. When my grandmother passed Kam was only 16 months old so I didn't need to worry about the explanation of why she was "sleeping" or why everyone was so sad.

When Kam came back from his visit to Idaho Falls for the services, I really didn't know what to expect. I didn't know how they explained it to him or what terms they used so a 3 year old could comprehend. Little did I know I had nothing to worry about.

On the way home Kam said to me "Mommy can you hold my hand please?" I reached into the backseat while driving and grabbed onto his tiny little hand. The way he squeezed a little tighter than normal I knew he needed some mommy time. So I began to ask him questions about the trip. I didn't say a word about Grandma Ricker, I just kept it simple asking the basic "what did you do? did you have fun?" type of questions. Instantly Kam started jabbering about Grandma Ricker and her 'castle'. After a few minutes of him explaining what he learned this is what I gathered.

Grandma Ricker got very sick and fell asleep. She is sleeping good now and can't play anymore. There was a lot of people there when she went into the ground, BUT she is in a castle now.

The castle comments really sparked my interest. I started asking questions about it and he replied with a sweet "Well mommy she is just in a big big big castle so she be OK." Simple as that. I was floored and also very teary eyed. It gets better. Kam then says "Grandpa Mark (my dad) won't go to a castle though. He won't get sick. If he does I will just be missing him a lot so he won't. You won't get sick will you mommy?" By now I am a mess. Tears are falling and nose is running. I squeezed his hand very tight and told him "Grandpa Mark won't get sick anytime soon and I especially won't. I still have way too many things to do and see before that happens. I don't want you to ever worry about that Kam. Ever" "OK I won't. We better wash our hands a lot so we don't get sick."

Overall I couldn't believe at how well he did with understanding something so scary, confusing, and complex. I mean, even I cannot talk about it. Maybe I should just start putting things into his perspective. I guess after all it is just a little trip to a castle in the sky.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Pinching my Pennies

Currently gas is $3.66 a gallon. Everytime I fill my tank up I feel as if I am selling my soul. My head hurts, things start to go dark, and just when I feel like it is the 'end' the nozzle makes that loud CLICK, I hold my breath and slowly open my eyes expecting to see the fiery gates of hell but instead see 'TOTAL $43.76'. After reading the total it is usually followed by some gasping, groaning, and muttering curse words under my breath. Once I get back into my car I slump down in the drivers seat and conjure up ideas on how to get myself and Kam from Tremonton to Logan on a pedal bike. Since that is highly unreasonable (although I know everyone that reads this is picturing me pedaling my butt 27 miles one way with a happy-go-lucky 3 year old on the handlebars holding my purse...) I have found some other ways to save money. Well I guess just one way. One really big, really awesome way to save money....COUPONS!

I love it. I love them. I love checking my mail to see if I got any new ones. I love filing them. I love printing them with my shiny new printer I bought just for them. I love coupons.

Now that we got my ranting and raving out of the way, lets discuss this coupon business, or as some like to call it '"couponing". My friend told me about her coupon experiences in January. She told me she saved over 50% (at least) on her groceries a month. I didn't believe it. I mean really though, using a coupon and getting things for free because of that coupon?! I needed an explination on a few things.
1. How in the heck does that happen?
2. Is it legal?
3. Why in the hell am I just NOW finding out about this?!?
The answers to those questions are as follows...You stack a coupon on top of rock bottom prices and get it for next to nothing, or nothing. Yes it is legal. I have been running around with the wrong crowd. (OK mom you were right. All these years. There I said it.) The crowd that doesn't save money.

After lots and lots of explaining, a filing system for the coupons, a new printer, and a handy little thing to take my coupons to the store in I can officialy say "I am a crazy coupon lady!" The money I save is ridiculous. The quantities of items I get is unheard of, and I just can't get enough of it. Sometimes the deals are so good I grab a bunch of extras and give them to my family. It is my way of making sure my name is at the top of everyones Christmas lists. :) Here are some examples of the great deals......


I got all this for $13.23
(most of those body washes were FREE!)



2 bottles of detergent. Before coupons $9.00 after $4.00




The razor alone would have normally been $12.89 before tax...
because of coupons all of it was $15.79!


So the moral of the story is, if you are looking to save money and don't want to ride a bike 56 miles a day start couponing! It is becoming more of a hobby to me and I absolutely cannot get enough of it. I can't believe I used to pay full price for things. Sometimes I do have to bite the bullet and buy things at regular price though and it almost hurts as bad as filling up the car with gas.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

The Health Mission

I have been really trying to be healthier and take better care of myself this year. This is what I like to call the Health Mission. It is my mission to look for more organic items, drink more soy and almond milk, cut out processed foods, drink 8 glasses of water a day, and cook dinner instead of ordering dinner or getting it out of a box.
So far it is going OK. I say OK because I am a candyholic. Other than that it is fabulous. Kam and I make our breakfast from scratch in the morning and the mornings we are in a hurry it is still something along the lines of fresh fruit and yogurt. I have made a huge effort to take lunches to work vs hitting a drive thru window. I know that a frozen pasta isn't always the best but I am sure it beats a deep fried piece of processed chicken that is cut into pieces that are shaped like the BK crown. Dinner is so much fun now. Tuna helper you can kiss my butt. The butt that you helped morph into a size bigger than I was 2 years ago. I am more adventurous and want to try to make things from scratch. When we don't cook we still keep it healthy.
For example last night Kam decided that he wanted pizza. I pulled out my file for restaurant coupons and found a pretty good one for Papa Murphy's take and bake. I asked Kam which one he wanted and he points to the vegetarian. This one is actually my favorite, I didn't know, however, how Kam would like it since it doesn't have red sauce or meat. He was persistent though so off I went, with my fingers crossed he would eat dinner that night, to pick up a pile of vegetables and cheese.
We get home, cook the pizza which looked amazing, (my mouth was watering the whole time it was baking and I was pacing the floor like a worried dog) and dish up. Kam was soooo excited to eat it. I was still worried that excitement would drain out of his little being the minute he tasted an artichoke heart. I sat him down at the table and gave him his piece that he picked out all by himself and asked what he would like to drink. "So do you want ice water, milk, Gatorade or orange juice?" In a very cheerful tone he replies "I want SOY MILK!"
That was the moment. The moment I knew my goal of raising a kid with his health in mind was being achieved. I was so impressed with my little man. I was even more impressed when he ate his ENTIRE piece of vegetarian pizza and washed it down with a cup of soy milk.

Mission accomplished. :)

Monday, May 2, 2011

This is the good life

As you may know I am a very optimistic person. I always try to make the absolute best of every situation and enjoy every aspect of my crazy little life. Here are some prime examples of what makes my life so gosh dang great. . .

  • Being a mommy. Not only being a mommy but, being a mommy to the best little boy in the world.
  • Having so many people in heaven watching over me.
  • My amazing family. Especially my sister. She always listens to my stories and offers advice.
  • I have a roof over my head, a vehicle that gets me from here to there and back, food to eat, a bed to climb into every night, and love from all those around me to hold it all together.
  • Vodka. Yes you read that right. Vodka makes my life better in many ways. Stress reliever in a bottle. Don't get the wrong idea, I am in no way an alcoholic, I am just a dang good time. :)
  • Music. It always has a way of making you just...you know...ahhh...EXACTLY!
  • My ability to laugh.
  • Best friends. Without them I would be soooo lost. Shaylise Bowen, Jessica Gledhill, and LaChelle Enright I wouldn't know what to do without you.
  • My health. I am sure I am not the healthiest person alive (refer to the vodka mention above) but I can get out of bed just fine, use my legs to get me places, my arms to pick up my little boy, my lungs to breathe, my eyes to see the beautiful things all around me, my mouth to eat delicious foods, the list goes on and on.
  • Comfortable couches. Better yet MY comfortable white chair.
  • Crafting. Creating things with my hands.
  • Bedtime stories with Kam. Reading Mars Needs Moms never ever ever gets old.
Those are just some of the many reasons I love life.

A little something I love....



Such a great phrase to live by! 

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

The KNOW:HOPE:BELIEVE list

10 things I KNOW are as follows....
  • Kameron Christopher John is my sunshine.
  • There is a heaven. My grandmother is there taking care of the sunflowers.
  • Kisses goodbye are good, but kissing goodbye, turning to leave, turning back and kissing again is sooo much better.
  • Climbing into a bed that has been made is the best feeling.
  • I will always have OCD about certain things. No changing that one.
  • Nothing, and I mean nothing makes me feel better than hearing Kam call me "Mommy"
  • Coffee is my daily vitamin.
  • I am always spun out on imagination. I daydream. I get 27 ideas at once. I can't help it.
  • My life is absolutely positively amazing. I learn everyday.
  • Prayers are answered. Some aren't. It always works out though.
10 things I HOPE for are as follows.....
  • More people will start seeing the glass as half full. Or just be happy to have a damn glass.
  • Kam will continue to grow and learn.
  • Medical breakthroughs will be made for cancer. All types. And soon.
  • God will continue to trust me and challenge me. He is doing a pretty good job of making this thing called life a great big adventure.
  • My dad will continue to be a huge part of Kam's life. Kam just adores that man and it makes me happy.  
  • I learn to bake bread. Good bread.
  • I can learn to be more patient.
  • One day I can make a man feel like the luckiest guy in the world.
  • To have a house with a white fence.
  • That my car will never break down on the side of the road again.
10 things I BELIEVE as follows......
  • I am doing an alright job of raising a little boy.
  • That little boy is very blessed to have a dad that plays a huge part in his life.
  • In God. In miracles. In faith.
  • Someday I will get married.
  • Perfect timing.
  • Creativity. I love being creative and challenging those around me to do the same.
  • I get a little stronger everyday.
  • Some of my best friends should have been my sisters, but God knew that our parents wouldn't have been able to handle us.
  • In keeping calm and carrying on.
  • Love is the best medicine.